Why is the church so secret about it?

Alex132 · Post by **Alex132** » Sat Mar 03, 2007 8:27 pm

I hope im not breaking any rules by posting this in here, but its a question i have had, and one that needs to be adressed.

Why is the church/Christians almost afraid to think/talk/ask about sex?
Alright there i said it.

Im just wondering, its almost like there afraid to talk about something that was created by God, catholics belive that its wrong, and i can understand their view about the "necessary evil" stuff. But all others are almost afraid of it. In the way it was intended it is ok, but all Christians think its wrong to talk/discuss it openly anyway.

Sure a person isn't gona just yell out, "HEY! WANA TALK ABOUT SEX?" but you know what i mean (i hope)

i hope i am not offending anyone with this topic, that was not its purpose.
If anyone is really offended at this topic let me know, i will ask for it to be deleted.

Skid · Post by **Skid** » Sat Mar 03, 2007 8:33 pm

Gnostic influences mostly.

Arwen · Post by **Arwen** » Sat Mar 03, 2007 8:49 pm

Oh man...if I could only send you a copy of couple messages one of my youth pastors gave. He gave one about how our bodies are the Lord's, and what NOT to do with them...and then he went into how sex is a really good thing designed by God for marriage, and Christians get more out of it and stuff like that. I have fond memories of looking around at all of the red faces...but he did mention how it's not talked about a lot...

Yeah, it's a touchy subject, but it ought to be addressed more firmly (even if it's not a regular subject). Because of the now routine abuse of it by the world, it seems to either get shown as a negative thing, or not at all addressed by the church. It needs to be told that it is a very GOOD thing given by God for a man and woman to share in marriage.

Oba-rai · Post by **Oba-rai** » Sat Mar 03, 2007 8:49 pm

Not most Christians. It's just not addressed openly. At least, not around 12-14 year olds, in most churches.

However, depending on how old someone is, it depends on whether people around that person feels like talking about it openly. If someone becomes overly exposed to sexuality (which is easily twisted/distorted by the culture, which for the most part does not respect true sex as God meant it to be), they may be deadened to the sacredness of sex within the marital boundaries.

Alex132 · Post by **Alex132** » Sat Mar 03, 2007 9:08 pm

Arwen wrote:Oh man...if I could only send you a copy of couple messages one of my youth pastors gave. He gave one about how our bodies are the Lord's, and what NOT to do with them...and then he went into how sex is a really good thing designed by God for marriage, and Christians get more out of it and stuff like that. I have fond memories of looking around at all of the red faces...but he did mention how it's not talked about a lot...

u could send em, it sounds like it would be a strange/funny/interesting read

Ruthie · Post by **Ruthie** » Sun Mar 04, 2007 10:58 am

It's definitely a touchy subject- but handled in the correct way, I think it can be addressed.

Now, a BAD way for the Church to go about this is doing a sermon series titled "My Lousy Sex Life" and advertising on billboards with suggestive pictures, and singing trashy sex songs in Church. (which- a few Churches are in fact doing)

I also don't think a pastor should address the subject just because it's the only thing 'left' on his 'list'. It should be brought about in a careful way, and be sure to tell the congregation ahead of time, because some families would be uncomfortable having their children *those who aren't released to Sunday School...etc.* hear a sermon about sex no matter how carefully it is presented.

God is definitely not against sex, but he is against adultery, fornication, pornography..etc..

The Church does need to be 'relevant' in today's culture, but that doesn't mean compromising the faith, or offering a 'better' sex life if you come to Church.

Now, for the issue of discussing this subject in Youth Groups. In today's world, sex is not something that is just something for marriage. So many teens are giving up their bodies before they are married. (or even old enough to get married!)

So, it does need to be addressed to Youth, but again- it must be handled in a correct way, and for the right age group. If your Youth Group contains 11-13 year olds, I don't think you should dedicate a meeting to sex. I think it would be better suited to a small group session- where the leader knows the youth better and personally.

If a Youth Pastor knows that a certain person is having an issue with this, then I think he should pray and try to help the kid through it.

But- in all of this, I stand firm in my belief that it is not the Church's job to raise a child! It is the PARENTS job to do so. Although, I know the Church can be very helpful to a teen who doesn't have both parents, or their parents aren't saved. But, ultimately- it is the father and mother's job to raise and teach their child about such things. NOT the Church's.

So, in conclusion- I think that the Church can address the topic of sex safely, but- it is not their sole purpose to educate people on such things.

[/end rant]

Baragon · Post by **Baragon** » Sun Mar 04, 2007 11:58 am

My church has never really kept away from the subject... They're pretty open on the matter and believe it should be discussed (I think that's the rightword) in a good light - though we don't have actual "sermons" on the matter.

And the people themselves are rather open on the subject... My bachelorette party proved that... Especially with the pastor's wife.

But I agree, in the proper way (God intended way) it's a good thing, and should be talked about so it's in a good (postive) light for married couples (married being the key word, since so many people jump outside of God's boundries now-a-days)

The Top Crusader · Post by **The Top Crusader** » Sun Mar 04, 2007 12:35 pm

My pastor preaches without clothes on.

Shad Lexer · Post by **Shad Lexer** » Sun Mar 04, 2007 1:04 pm

The Top Crusader wrote:My pastor preaches without clothes on.

That's signature worthy.

Jonathan · Post by **Jonathan** » Sun Mar 04, 2007 1:19 pm

Simbelmyne34 wrote:But- in all of this, I stand firm in my belief that it is not the Church's job to raise a child! It is the PARENTS job to do so. Although, I know the Church can be very helpful to a teen who doesn't have both parents, or their parents aren't saved. But, ultimately- it is the father and mother's job to raise and teach their child about such things. NOT the Church's.

So, in conclusion- I think that the Church can address the topic of sex safely, but- it is not their sole purpose to educate people on such things.

[/end rant]

Thank you, I was waiting for someone to say that.

catholics belive that its wrong,

That would be news to me.

Shad Lexer · Post by **Shad Lexer** » Sun Mar 04, 2007 2:32 pm

Jonathan wrote:
catholics belive that its wrong,
That would be news to me.

Yeah, if they believe that then how come there are still Catholics around. They'd be extinct.

Arwen · Post by **Arwen** » Sun Mar 04, 2007 6:33 pm

Alex132 wrote:
Arwen wrote:Oh man...if I could only send you a copy of couple messages one of my youth pastors gave. He gave one about how our bodies are the Lord's, and what NOT to do with them...and then he went into how sex is a really good thing designed by God for marriage, and Christians get more out of it and stuff like that. I have fond memories of looking around at all of the red faces...but he did mention how it's not talked about a lot...
u could send em, it sounds like it would be a strange/funny/interesting read

Not text, sound recording.

Alex132 · Post by **Alex132** » Sun Mar 04, 2007 7:04 pm

oh that could be a different story... mp3 files?

thelovelyrose · Post by **thelovelyrose** » Sun Mar 04, 2007 11:01 pm

The Friendly Tank wrote:
Jonathan wrote:
catholics belive that its wrong,
That would be news to me.
Yeah, if they believe that then how come there are still Catholics around. They'd be extinct.

That's why (in today's modern society) they can have adoptions and test-tube babies and in-vitro fertilization--and forced conversions. There's more than one way to procreate. (Totally kidding! Not all Catholics are monks, priests, and nuns!

)

Lord_Kappa · Post by **Lord_Kappa** » Mon Mar 05, 2007 6:17 am

^:lol: That was funny/

I think churches tend to stay away from it, especially with younger children, because different parents have different ideas for how their child should learn. Some parents never say the word sex until the child is however old. Other parents don't care and let their kids run around crazy.
The church can't please the people who don't want to hear the word and the people who are totally cool with it. So they just ignore the subject instead of bringing it up to one party or anothers dissapointment or even disgust.

Small groups can talk about sex. The pastor can talk about sex. But it's not often as big of an issue with adults (or at least it's not percieved to be.) The teens are the ones who need it most, but again, some parents are this way, and the others that.

Pam Stencil (sp?) is a christian speaker who speaks about sex. You can get video clips of her speeches online. (Sorry about not knowing how to spell her name).

Conniepaw · Post by **Conniepaw** » Mon Mar 05, 2007 9:36 am

Lord_Kappa wrote:

Pam Stencil (sp?) is a christian speaker who speaks about sex. You can get video clips of her speeches online. (Sorry about not knowing how to spell her name).

I love her...we watched her video in yg...she was so funny...

Pam: I hate it when girls tell me it was an accident. Now a man going to check his mail without his clothes on running into a girl without clothes on...Now that would be an accident..

Baragon · Post by **Baragon** » Mon Mar 05, 2007 1:21 pm

Simbelmyne34 wrote:But- in all of this, I stand firm in my belief that it is not the Church's job to raise a child! It is the PARENTS job to do so. Although, I know the Church can be very helpful to a teen who doesn't have both parents, or their parents aren't saved. But, ultimately- it is the father and mother's job to raise and teach their child about such things. NOT the Church's.

I agree... But I also think teens are hardest hit with the problem areas when it comes to this topic. I really have no clue how it should be addressed for them, but I do think the church should play some slightly significant role to help shape their views and such on it.

Sherlock · Post by **Sherlock** » Mon Mar 05, 2007 3:44 pm

Alex132 wrote: Im just wondering, its almost like there afraid to talk about something that was created by God, catholics belive that its wrong, and i can understand their view about the "necessary evil" stuff.

Well, if we believed it was wrong, I hardly think there would be any Catholics left to support that theory.

(And for the record, Catholics only believe it is wrong when engaged in outside of marriage (i.e. fornication and adultery). But then again, I'm guessing a majority of sects also hold this belief).

ajamj · Post by **ajamj** » Mon Mar 05, 2007 6:51 pm

I am a parent and it is my responsibility to talk with/teach my children about sex. I am not saying that the subject should be completely taboo at church. It should start at home.

Baragon · Post by **Baragon** » Mon Mar 05, 2007 7:46 pm

ajamj wrote:I am a parent and it is my responsibility to talk with/teach my children about sex. I am not saying that the subject should be completely taboo at church. It should start at home.

Exactly my opinion but said with a ... parental touch to it brought to you by ajamj. $\:D/$

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