Lets tell jokes!!

Abigail · Post by **Abigail** » Tue Oct 31, 2006 8:37 am

Ok what the title said.

There was this blonde that went to an applince store, and she asked the man and said, "Sir, I want to by that TV" and he said"I am sorry but I do not sell to blondes" so this blonde goes and dyes her hair and comes back and asks again "Sir, I want to by that TV" and he says again, "I am sorry but I do not sell to blondes" So she goes and changes her WHOLE wardrobe and comes back and says "Sir I want to buy that TV" and he says "Ma'am, I am sorry but I DO NOT sell to blondes" and the blonde asks "How do you know I am a blonde" and he says "Ma'am, that "TV" you want to buy is a microwave."

-Sweet Alaska

Macnut · Post by **Macnut** » Tue Oct 31, 2006 8:42 am

Blonde jokes?

Hmm.

Okay. A blonde was walking down the sidewalk one day and saw a brunette jumping up and down on a railroad saying, "21, 21, 21, 21..." over and over again. The blonde decided to join her and went over the railroad tracks and started jumping up and down saying, "21, 21, 21, 21..." over and over again. A train came and the brunette got off the tracks but the blonde didn't. After the train went by hitting the blonde the brunette got back on the tracks saying, "22, 22, 22, 22, 22...."

Abigail · Post by **Abigail** » Tue Oct 31, 2006 8:46 am

Ok......I didn't really get it, oh and it doesn't hsve to be just blonde jokes, any kind.

-SA

Trent DeWhite · Post by **Trent DeWhite** » Tue Oct 31, 2006 8:47 am

Hillingdale alert.

Candy · Post by **Candy** » Tue Oct 31, 2006 8:51 am

Funny!!!!!

Here Is Another blond joke!!

There is Horrible hail storm and this college girl's Car Gets ALL beat up.
So she goes to this mechanic and says "Sir, how long would it take for you to get these dents out of my car?" And the mechanic seeing she is a blond, says "Go back to your collage and blow in your tail pipe, then all the ents will all pop out!" And her being a blond goes back and starts blowing in the tail pipe.
Her room mate (also a blond) comes out of her room to see her friend blowing in the tail pipe. She asks "WHAT are you doing?!" She says I'm blowing out the dents in my car." Her room mate looks at her and says "You dummy, you need to roll up the windows first.

Zelda Jacobs · Post by **Zelda Jacobs** » Tue Oct 31, 2006 8:53 am

This isn't a joke, but I found this funny link: http://www.albinoblacksheep.com/flash/numa.php

This one my brothers jokes that I found. It's not that great, but see what you think.

Okay, so there were two muffins in an oven.

One muffin says to the other one, "Man, it's hot in here!"

The other muffin replies "AAAAAHHHHHH!!!!! A TALKING MUFFIN!!!!!"

Applesauce · Post by **Applesauce** » Tue Oct 31, 2006 8:55 am

I'd never heard that one before, macnut!

Trent DeWhite wrote:Hillingdale alert.

I'm afraid Trent's right. While things appear to be a little more lenient today than most days, regular rules still apply. And this topic does belong in Hillingdale Haven.

Jessicado · Post by **Jessicado** » Tue Oct 31, 2006 8:56 am

What do you call something brown, blue and black found in a ditch?

A brunette who told too many blonde jokes

Why are blonde jokes so short?

So brunettes can remember them (although apparently you guys must be above par intelligence because you used the longer ones!)

When does a brunette finally get noticed at an event?

When all the blondes leave!!!! $\:D/$

uz · Post by uz » Tue Oct 31, 2006 8:56 am

how about let's not and say we did! $\:D/$

Jack Davis · Post by **Jack Davis** » Tue Oct 31, 2006 4:11 pm

How do you get a one handed blond out of a tree??

just wave.

Abigail · Post by **Abigail** » Tue Oct 31, 2006 4:31 pm

Oh I get it, cool.

What is the difference between a teacher and a train?

Click the letter y and hold down the mouse button and drag your mouse to the letter z to find the answer.

YBecause a teacher says "Spit your gum out" and a train says"choo choo"Z

-SA

chocolate · Post by **chocolate** » Tue Oct 31, 2006 5:04 pm

here you go! its not a blonde joke, but is still funny!

>>> > TO BE 6 AGAIN
>>> > A man was sitting on the edge of the bed,
>>> > observing his wife turning back and forth,
>>> > looking at herself in the mirror.
>>> >
>>> >
>>> > Since her birthday was not far off,
>>> > he asked what she'd like to have for
>>> > her Birthday.
>>> >
>>> >
>>> > I'd like to be six again, she replied, still looking in the
>> mirror.
>>> >
>>> >
>>> > On the morning of her Birthday, he arose early,
>>> > made her a nice big bowl of Lucky Charms,
>>> > and then took her to Six Flags theme park.
>>> > What a day !
>>> > He put her on every ride in the park; the Death
>>> > Slide, the Wall of Fear, the Screaming Monster
>>> > Roller Coaster... everything there was. Five hours
>>> > Later they staggered out of the theme park. Her
>>> > head was reeling and her stomach felt upside down.
>>> >
>>> >
>>> > He then took her to a McDonald's where he
>>> > ordered her a Happy Meal with extra fries
>>> > and a chocolate shake.
>>> >
>>> >
>>> > Then it was off to a movie, popcorn, a soda pop,
>>> > and her favorite candy, M&M's.
>>> > What a fabulous adventure !
>>> > Finally she wobbled home with her
>>> > husband and collapsed into bed exhausted.
>>> >
>>> >
>>> > He leaned over his wife with a big smile and
>>> > lovingly asked, Well Dear, what was it like being six again ??
>>> >
>>> >
>>> > Her eyes slowly opened and her __expression suddenly changed.
>>> >
>>> >
>>> > I meant my Dress Size, you IDIOT!!!!!
>>> >
>>> > The moral of the story: Even when a man is listening, he is going
>> to
>> get
>>> >it wrong.

Pc Pro · Post by **Pc Pro** » Wed Nov 01, 2006 2:09 am

nice jokes every one

as for me I have a Cop joke

Going to bed the other night I noticed people in my shed stealing things. I called the police and was told on offices where available but they would send one over as soon as possible. I hung up but rang back a minute later and told them I have shot them. Within minutes there where half a dozen police cars in the street, a helicopter over head and Special Operations Group surrounding my garden shed. Naturally, they caught the thieves red handed. One of the SOG guys said to me “I thought you said you had shot them” “ I thought you told me no one was available: I replied.

Apache 64D · Post by **Apache 64D** » Wed Nov 01, 2006 4:09 am

How do you get two piccolo players to play in perfect unison?

Shoot one.

Old Brad · Post by **Old Brad** » Wed Nov 01, 2006 1:17 pm

Why did the squirrel cross the street?

He wanted to show his girlfriend he had guts.

What's black and white and black and white black and white?

A nun falling down the stairs.

What's black and white and laughing?

The nun who pushed her.

The next few go together. Please try to guess them before you highlight the answer.

Q: How do you put a giraffe in a refrigerator?

A: Open the door and put him in.

Q: How do you put an elephant in a refrigerator?

A: Open the door, take the giraffe out, and put him in.

Q: All the animals called a meeting. All of them were there, except one. Which one wasn't there?

A: The elephant. He was still in the refrigerator.

Q: You have to cross alligator in fested waters. you don't have a canoe, or a gun, or anything. How do you get across?

A: Just swim across. All the alligators are at the meeting.

I hope you all enjoyed these.

chocolate · Post by **chocolate** » Wed Nov 01, 2006 1:25 pm

^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Those are so aweosme!
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

Old Brad · Post by **Old Brad** » Wed Nov 01, 2006 1:28 pm

taknbychrist wrote:^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Those are so aweosme!
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

Are you talking about mine, or everyones?

Stubborn · Post by **Stubborn** » Wed Nov 01, 2006 1:28 pm

That was soo good, taknbychrist!

Lucy

Agent3xq · Post by **Agent3xq** » Wed Nov 01, 2006 1:30 pm

taknbychrist wrote:here you go! its not a blonde joke, but is still funny!

>>> > TO BE 6 AGAIN
>>> > A man was sitting on the edge of the bed,
>>> > observing his wife turning back and forth,
>>> > looking at herself in the mirror.
>>> >
>>> >
>>> > Since her birthday was not far off,
>>> > he asked what she'd like to have for
>>> > her Birthday.
>>> >
>>> >
>>> > I'd like to be six again, she replied, still looking in the
>> mirror.
>>> >
>>> >
>>> > On the morning of her Birthday, he arose early,
>>> > made her a nice big bowl of Lucky Charms,
>>> > and then took her to Six Flags theme park.
>>> > What a day !
>>> > He put her on every ride in the park; the Death
>>> > Slide, the Wall of Fear, the Screaming Monster
>>> > Roller Coaster... everything there was. Five hours
>>> > Later they staggered out of the theme park. Her
>>> > head was reeling and her stomach felt upside down.
>>> >
>>> >
>>> > He then took her to a McDonald's where he
>>> > ordered her a Happy Meal with extra fries
>>> > and a chocolate shake.
>>> >
>>> >
>>> > Then it was off to a movie, popcorn, a soda pop,
>>> > and her favorite candy, M&M's.
>>> > What a fabulous adventure !
>>> > Finally she wobbled home with her
>>> > husband and collapsed into bed exhausted.
>>> >
>>> >
>>> > He leaned over his wife with a big smile and
>>> > lovingly asked, Well Dear, what was it like being six again ??
>>> >
>>> >
>>> > Her eyes slowly opened and her __expression suddenly changed.
>>> >
>>> >
>>> > I meant my Dress Size, you IDIOT!!!!!
>>> >
>>> > The moral of the story: Even when a man is listening, he is going
>> to
>> get
>>> >it wrong.

my uth pastor told me that joke before!

Pc Pro · Post by **Pc Pro** » Wed Nov 01, 2006 9:10 pm

hah very good everone $\:D/$