ToO Epidemic?

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jelly
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Post by jelly »

Well, if they're leaving.. it doesn't really matter what we say, because they won't see it. ;)

I know first-hand the temptation to leave as a method of getting attention and to see who actually cares about you enough to say goodbye. And then when you decide to come back later, you get that attention all over again when everyone welcomes you back. I'm not saying you shouldn't leave, or that God isn't indeed calling away... but I believe that if He is, the mature thing to do is to not make a big deal of it. Simply remove the bookmark from your browser, and resist the temptation to log on for awhile. The surprising thing is, most people probably won't notice that you're gone. But when you come back later, you can see who truly missed you.. and when they ask where you were, just tell them that you felt led to take a break.

eh, maybe I am taking it too seriously. In all honesty I don't really care. ;)
Fallacy of false continuum. // bookworm
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ric
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Post by ric »

Jelly the dignified people hater. \:D/
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bookworm
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Post by bookworm »

Well, the other thing is I’m not sure how much good these absences do, even if the motives are completely pure.
I mean, if you really do spend too much time here, does taking a break actually help anything?
You spend all day on here, and figure that’s not a good thing. So you go away for two weeks. Then you come back… and pick up where you left off? What’s the point?
Instead of leaving completely, it makes more sense to me to just decrease your activity here. Maybe only log on twice a week instead of every day.
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jelly
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Post by jelly »

bookworm wrote:Well, the other thing is I’m not sure how much good these absences do, even if the motives are completely pure.
I mean, if you really do spend too much time here, does taking a break actually help anything?
You spend all day on here, and figure that’s not a good thing. So you go away for two weeks. Then you come back… and pick up where you left off? What’s the point?
Instead of leaving completely, it makes more sense to me to just decrease your activity here. Maybe only log on twice a week instead of every day.
eh, it's really up to them.. and possibly between them and God. Or their parents. ;)

Also I'm not trying to be all super insensitive to certain people... someone started a thread talking about absences, so I'm sharing my experienced opinion in general. \:D/
Last edited by jelly on Thu Apr 21, 2011 10:52 am, edited 1 time in total.
Fallacy of false continuum. // bookworm
Any cupcake can be made holy through being baptized in the name of the Butter, the Vanilla and the Powdered Sugar. // Kait
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Post by American Eagle »

Anyone ever heard of closure? When you think God wants you to do something, you want to make it official. (Yes, I've "retired" too.)

If you don't like reading "goodbye" posts, hey, just don't read them. (That sounds like something you would say, Jelly. :P)
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jelly
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Post by jelly »

Anyone ever heard of closure? When you think God wants you to do something, you want to make it official. (Yes, I've "retired" too.)
Ya, and so have I. And I know the embarrassment and awkwardness that I've ended up causing myself because I tried to make a big deal out of the fact that I was leaving. :P
If you don't like reading "goodbye" posts, hey, just don't read them. (That sounds like something you would say, Jelly. :P)
I know. I'm a hypocrite sometimes. :(
Fallacy of false continuum. // bookworm
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Moontide
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Post by Moontide »

I often take breaks by accident, because I get detracted doing other things (like fixing Wikipedia for example) but I never post that I am leaving, because if I came back to post it then I wouldn't be taking a break so I wouldn't need to post it. \:D/
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31899
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Post by 31899 »

ric wrote:Everyone, I really need to get my priorities straight. So I've decided that I need to...WATCH EVERY EPISODE OF DOCTOR WHO EVER MADE IN UNDER A MONTH!!! That just really takes precedence over my friends, so I'll be leaving for under a month. :(
At least someone on this forum has their priorities in order :noway:

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Taps
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Post by Taps »

Jelly wrote:Well, if they're leaving.. it doesn't really matter what we say, because they won't see it. ;)

I know first-hand the temptation to leave as a method of getting attention and to see who actually cares about you enough to say goodbye. And then when you decide to come back later, you get that attention all over again when everyone welcomes you back. I'm not saying you shouldn't leave, or that God isn't indeed calling away... but I believe that if He is, the mature thing to do is to not make a big deal of it. Simply remove the bookmark from your browser, and resist the temptation to log on for awhile. The surprising thing is, most people probably won't notice that you're gone. But when you come back later, you can see who truly missed you.. and when they ask where you were, just tell them that you felt led to take a break.

eh, maybe I am taking it too seriously. In all honesty I don't really care. ;)
Oh I agree with you Jelly sometimes I am very tempted to just go off for a while and be like- I am leaving forever! and then come back. But I won't unless I actually do. So you guys will still have to put up with me for a while :(
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Joanne
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Post by Joanne »

Hey everyone. What's this? I come back on for Lee's birthday and see you all think we are in on a scheme? Now, now. Let me explain. I was spending waay to much time on here, I spent a lot of time thinking about (and dreading) my break. I did not talk to anyone about leaving (other than saying goodbye), and certainly did not even think about what people would say to me. I simply wanted to inform my friends I was leaving and didn't have time to PM everyone. ;) As for if a complete break will really help? It does. When I told myself not to spend much time on the ToO anymore it did not work at all. Telling everyone I was leaving for a month however, gave me a ton of accountability because that way everyone knew that if I posted I was on when I shouldn't be. ;)

So I hope that clears things up for you all. \:D/
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Kenric
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Post by Kenric »

In my observation, a lot of forum frequenters have addictive personalities (as do I).
So, once they become accepted into a group as great as the ones on the ToO,
it becomes a big part of life (like it did for me).

It's hard to just decrease your activity once you've posted on a topic.
You feel like you're leaving someone hanging when you respond to a topic and leave for days,
so you come back to check it, and before you know it, you're here for four/five hours.

Sooooo, in summation, that's why people write epic goodbye posts.
We feel the need to quit cold turkey and spend time in the real world.
I speak because that's what happened to me ;).
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