The Peanut Butter Randoms!

SivartM · Post by **SivartM** » Tue Aug 12, 2008 9:28 am

*sits and eats peanut butter*

(Six seconds later...)

Is there a cure yet?

*accidentally eats fungus*

Oops...

Amethystic · Post by **Amethystic** » Tue Aug 12, 2008 9:31 am

Yes... read my last post and follow the instructions!

SivartM · Post by **SivartM** » Tue Aug 12, 2008 9:32 am

But I'm deathly allergic to mustard...

Is there an alternative treatment? Like, one that involves singing "Row, Row, Row The Boat" very loudly in a public place?

Amethystic · Post by **Amethystic** » Tue Aug 12, 2008 9:37 am

SivartM wrote:But I'm deathly allergic to mustard...

Is there an alternative treatment? Like, one that involves singing "Row, Row, Row The Boat" very loudly in a public place?

Um, fine. *types on the computer* Here we go:

Siv's Step 1: You must sing the words to "Row, Row, Row Your Boat" 1,000 times while doing the Macarina dance on West Edmonton Mall's main stage while wearing a skirt. You must do this once a week for 6 months.

SivartM · Post by **SivartM** » Tue Aug 12, 2008 9:56 am

Amethystic wrote:
SivartM wrote:But I'm deathly allergic to mustard...

Is there an alternative treatment? Like, one that involves singing "Row, Row, Row The Boat" very loudly in a public place?
Um, fine. *types on the computer* Here we go:

Siv's Step 1: You must sing the words to "Row, Row, Row Your Boat" 1,000 times while doing the Macarina dance on West Edmonton Mall's main stage while wearing a skirt. You must do this once a week for 6 months.

*follows instructions*

Six months later...

Well, my self-esteem went down about 99%. Is that good?

Amethystic · Post by **Amethystic** » Tue Aug 12, 2008 9:58 am

SivartM wrote:
Amethystic wrote:
SivartM wrote:But I'm deathly allergic to mustard...

Is there an alternative treatment? Like, one that involves singing "Row, Row, Row The Boat" very loudly in a public place?
Um, fine. *types on the computer* Here we go:

Siv's Step 1: You must sing the words to "Row, Row, Row Your Boat" 1,000 times while doing the Macarina dance on West Edmonton Mall's main stage while wearing a skirt. You must do this once a week for 6 months.
*follows instructions*

Six months later...

Well, my self-esteem went down about 99%. Is that good?

Nope, your self-esteem has to be down a full 100% before the next step will work on you. BTW: Nice dancing at the mall, it needed some entertainment!

Danielle Abigail Maxwell · Tue Aug 12, 2008 10:26 am

Wait, West Edmonton Mall? Like as in Edmonton, Alberta, Canada? I'VE BEEN THERE!!!!!! W00t!!!!! Wow... I missed something, didn't I?

I hate mustard! *is glad she isn't infected!* Now I feel sick... uh-oh... Nice job guys...

Amethystic · Post by **Amethystic** » Tue Aug 12, 2008 10:29 am

Danielle Abigail Maxwell wrote:Wait, West Edmonton Mall? Like as in Edmonton, Alberta, Canada? I'VE BEEN THERE!!!!!! W00t!!!!! Wow... I missed something, didn't I?

I hate mustard! *is glad she isn't infected!* Now I feel sick... uh-oh... Nice job guys...

I live about twenty minutes from the mall. I was there yesterday. Why do you think I picked it?

What do you mean sick?

mike_rowe · Post by **mike_rowe** » Tue Aug 12, 2008 10:38 am

dang!

Amethystic · Post by **Amethystic** » Tue Aug 12, 2008 10:39 am

mike_rowe wrote:dang!

Don't tell me you caught the fungus too!

SivartM · Post by **SivartM** » Tue Aug 12, 2008 10:44 am

Good news! I have absolutely no self-esteem left! Now what do I do?

Amethystic · Post by **Amethystic** » Tue Aug 12, 2008 10:51 am

BBB: Alright, Step 2 applies to all of you fungal patients.

Siv: Even me?

BBB: Yes. Now, Step 2: You must go out into the Canadian wilderness and live off the land for a few weeks, eating only fish, berries, and bear meat. You will be given nothing but a knife and a tent, and you must all bathe at least once a day.

Siv: But the Canadian Rockies will be covered in snow!

Amy: Um, actually, only the very tops are covered in snow. The sides of the mountains are all trees.

Siv: Oh.

BBB: Anyway, we'll come get you when we think you are ready for the next step. *drops Siv, Dan, and Elise off in the mountains*

SivartM · Post by **SivartM** » Tue Aug 12, 2008 11:01 am

Siv: This is boring.

Elise: Look, I just built us a lodge out of fallen logs!

Dan: And I built a solar heater!

Siv: O.o In five minutes?

Dan: We believe in being as efficient as possible.

Elise: Oh, and we made a microwave oven out of that hidden camera.

Siv: O.o

At Random HQ:

BBB: You don't think they'll mind, do you?

Amy: Look how great they're doing!

BBB: And they'll each get a million dollars.

Amy: And us, too!

BBB: Reality shows are great.

Amy: Yup! Hey, we might as well take advantage of Step 2 and get some money out of it, right?

Amethystic · Post by **Amethystic** » Tue Aug 12, 2008 11:22 am

Amy: Alright, Dan and Siv voted Elise off and so now she's back in the lab. Should we give them the next part of Step 2?

BBB: Alright. *turns on mic* Okay you two, you voted--er decided that Elise was the most healthy person among you, so she was taken back to the lab. We must now determine which one of you is the next healthiest so that we can take them back too.

Amy: So we've set up an obsticle course. Do it and then we will decide who returns to the lab.

Siv: Okay, I'm guessing that the rings of fire, the snapping turtle pool, and the pit of rabid moose is all part of the course.

Amy: Duh. Ready Siv? On your mark, get set, GO!

*Siv tries to hop through the rings of fire*

Siv: 'SIZZLE' OW!

*Siv tries to swing over pool of turtles*

Siv: 'SPLASH' OW!

*Siv tries to jump over moose pit*

Siv: 'PLOP' OW!

Amy: Alright, Dan's next!

Dan: Oh boy....

Siv: Uhhhhn...pain. *collapses*

In the lab...

BBB: Siv got a time of 1:07.

Amy: This is great! Siv's suffering is bringing our ratings up!

BBB: Yay!

BrokenButBeautiful · Post by **BrokenButBeautiful** » Tue Aug 12, 2008 11:48 am

BBB: Ok, I know who's coming back to the lab.

Amy: But Dan hasn't finished the corse yet.

BBB: That's beside the point. *turns on mic* Amy and I decided that Dan is healthier, so Dan is coming back to the lab. *turns off mic* So, now what?

BBB

Amethystic · Post by **Amethystic** » Tue Aug 12, 2008 12:15 pm

Dan: *is back inside sealed container* I still don't get why I got sent back.

Amy: Well after Siv ran the course, you were obviously in better shape!

Dan: Good point.

Amy: BBB should be back with him any minute now...

BBB: *lands helicopter* We're back!

Siv: *groans*

Amy: Maybe we should give them a break before we move on to Step 3.

Elise: Good idea!

Dan: Sounds good to me!

Siv: *groans*

A few days later...

Amy: Alright, now for Step 3.

Siv: Will it be as painful as Step 2?

BBB: Shut it and listen!

Amy: Anway for Step 3 you will be put into suspended animation and sent to the planet Xenar for anti-fungalspectralradiohazardous lasering treatment.

Elise: What does that mean?

BBB: It means that the aliens are going to zap you with special lasers to make the fungus go away.

Elise, Dan, and Siv: Oooooooooh.

Amy: So we will now transfer you into these sleep capsules for the journey. The pick-up should be here soon. *puts them in capsules*

BBB: Nighty-night everyone. Sweet dreams! *hits 'Sleep' button*

Amy: Alright, Osmo should be here soon with his ship.

BBB: How do you know him again?

Amy: We went to school together when I lived on Xenar.

BBB: Oh.

*spaceship lands outside*

Amy: There he is! Let's get these capsules loaded!

BrokenButBeautiful · Post by **BrokenButBeautiful** » Tue Aug 12, 2008 12:38 pm

BBB: *Finishes loading the capsules* Osmo better not drop them in space!

Amy: Don't worry BBB. It'll be fine. *Mumbles* I hope...

BBB: What was that?

Amy: Nothing...

BBB: Ok....

*Osmo takes off with his ship*

In space...

Osmo: Oh no. I think I lost something...

*Dan, Elise, and Siv start floating around space in their pods*

Back at the randoms' HQ...

*A loud alarm noise starts sounding*

*BBB and Amy cover their ears*

BBB: What is that???

Amy: What? I can't hear you!

BBB: What's that noise!

Amy: What is poise? Why are you asking about poise at a time like this? Siv, Dan, and Elise are lost in space!

BBB: What!!!!!!!

BBB

Danielle Abigail Maxwell · Tue Aug 12, 2008 12:56 pm

Amethystic wrote:
Danielle Abigail Maxwell wrote:Wait, West Edmonton Mall? Like as in Edmonton, Alberta, Canada? I'VE BEEN THERE!!!!!! W00t!!!!! Wow... I missed something, didn't I?

I hate mustard! *is glad she isn't infected!* Now I feel sick... uh-oh... Nice job guys...
I live about twenty minutes from the mall. I was there yesterday. Why do you think I picked it?

What do you mean sick?

I literally felt sick to my stomach earlier. It wasn't you... rode my bike to work... blah.

Oh, wow, I've been to the mall twice for the waterpark... I LOVE THAT PLACE!

I have yet to read all that transpired while I was gone... doing so now!

Amethystic · Post by **Amethystic** » Tue Aug 12, 2008 1:06 pm

Amy: Now what?! They might be up there for thousands of years! And they are out of the radio wave zone, so we can't use Siv's tracer to find them! They could be lost forever!

And what if they find a way to return, but we're all dead?

BBB: We could go into suspended animation. That way, we won't get old and die while they're gone.

Amy: Okay, I think we have a capsule chamber somewhere, I just need to check the map. Oh! And we'll leave HIP on the surface to give them instructions!

BBB: HIP?

Amy: Holograhpic Image Producer. *pulls out metal hippy robot*

HIP: Like, totally.

BBB: Okay. Well, lets start getting everything ready.

Later...

BBB: Okay, we sealed off all of the enterances to Random HQ, put HIP outside, and the sleep capsules will turn on in ten minutes. Wanna p.b.j. sandwich to tie you over for the next thousand years?

Amy: Technically we don't need food to survive, but sure! *takes sandwich*

BBB: I guess we should get into our capsules now...

Amy: In case we never get woken up, it was nice being your friend!

BBB: Same here. Well, goodnight! *gets into capsule*

Amy: Though it could quite possibly be good millenium, goodnight! *gets into capsule*

*capsules activate*

SivartM · Post by **SivartM** » Tue Aug 12, 2008 3:55 pm

Meanwhile, up in space...

Siv: *yawn* Good morning, everyone!

Dan: *snore*

Elise: *snore*

Siv: Ugh. Wake up, sleepyheads! *checks clock on capsule* Wow, we've been asleep for... twelve whole minutes!

Dan: *snort* Whaaaa?

Siv: WAKE UP!

Dan and Elise: Five more minutes... *snore*

Siv: Gr. *looks around* Apparently, we're lost in space. *turns on GPS* And the GPS signals don't travel this far! Great, just great!

Dan and Elise: *snore*

Siv: Well, I guess it's up to me to get us... somewhere. I wonder which is closer, Earth or Xenar. *guesses* I bet Earth is closer! *rummages around for an oar*

The Town of Odyssey

The Peanut Butter Randoms!

I'll help you fight the evil forces of the meatless chicken burgers through courage and randomness!