Ask the Conspiracy Theorist

Johnny · Post by **Johnny** » Tue Apr 07, 2009 8:43 am

Seriously I will give you the most realistic and wacky answers to your questions. Just fire it away.

Seriously

KODY 105 · Post by **KODY 105** » Tue Apr 07, 2009 10:09 am

What is the name of your grandma's hairdresser's pet's veterinarian?

Why do I not believe you?

Who are your three most favorite characters from Adventures in Odyssey?

Do you listen to DGL?

What do you know of the supposed communistic influences in tetris?

Johnny · Post by **Johnny** » Tue Apr 07, 2009 10:16 am

KODY 105 wrote:What is the name of your grandma's hairdresser's pet's veterinarian?

Why do I not believe you?

Who are your three most favorite characters from Adventures in Odyssey?

Do you listen to DGL?

What do you know of the supposed communistic influences in tetris?

*scowls* How should I know? I don't even think my grandmother had a pet she's allergic to dogs and cats.

You have no reason not to believe me I told you the truth.

I like to many to narrow it down to three but if one were to hold a gun to my head it would be Bernard, Wooton, Eugene and if I could have more I would add Jason to the mix.

No I don't.

Hah! I started that conspiracy.

KODY 105 · Post by **KODY 105** » Tue Apr 07, 2009 10:18 am

Q wrote:
KODY 105 wrote:What is the name of your grandma's hairdresser's pet's veterinarian?

Why do I not believe you?

Who are your three most favorite characters from Adventures in Odyssey?

Do you listen to DGL?

What do you know of the supposed communistic influences in tetris?
*scowls* How should I know? I don't even think my grandmother had a pet she's allergic to dogs and cats.

You have no reason not to believe me I told you the truth.

I like to many to narrow it down to three but if one were to hold a gun to my head it would be Bernard, Wooton, Eugene and if I could have more I would add Jason to the mix.

No I don't.

Hah! I started that conspiracy.

You misunderstand, sir. I said your grandmother's hairdresser's pet's veterinarian.

That was confusing, though, was not it?

Who said, "Trust but verify"?

Now can you explain the supposed communistic influences in tetris?

Johnny · Post by **Johnny** » Tue Apr 07, 2009 10:25 am

You misunderstand, sir. I said your grandmother's hairdresser's pet's veterinarian. That was confusing, though, was not it?

Who said, "Trust but verify"?

Now can you explain the supposed communistic influences in tetris?

Yes it was I should have been more attentive.

Ronald Reagan

I can

KODY 105 · Post by **KODY 105** » Tue Apr 07, 2009 10:28 am

What are the supposed communistic influences in Tetris?

Johnny · Post by **Johnny** » Tue Apr 07, 2009 10:30 am

A friend of mine name Benjamin Baxter explained it pretty well. Not as much as me but I am sure you don't want to read my inch thick report..

I PLAY TETRIS. It is simultaneously the best and the worst video game of all time.

Discounting famine, fascism and genocide, Tetris brought a tear to more eyes than any other Soviet export.

It’s got a lot going for it. Though it debuted on home computer systems in the mid-‘80s, any halfway-knowledgeable video game junkie could tell you it first found widespread success back on the first Game Boy.

Tetris has appeared on virtually every console and handheld since, and derivations of the same falling blocks formula have dominated the puzzle genre.

But the copycats can’t compare to Tetris’ charming simplicity.

The long, skinny red pieces, the yellow squares, the blue and green L-shaped pieces and whatever those other two are called continue to entice procrastinators of all ages, decades after it was first released.

I’m one of these procrastinators.

The game’s addictiveness is unsurpassed, and this is why I hate it so much.

I don’t really mean hate, though. It’s more like one of those schoolgirl crushes where I pretend to hate him only so he pays more attention to me.

I have problems.

But so does Tetris — it’s an affront to the Western world as we know it. I think I can even prove it.

Tetris came out of the Soviet Union just after it started to fall apart from the inside.

In case you’re like me and weren’t born yet, I’ll give you some perspective — that was also about the time Reagan started talking about how the commies were a bigger threat than ever.

In a flawless, perfectly organized world of blues, greens and yellows, a single skinny piece can tear it all down. The more chaotic the blues, greens and yellows, the less effective the skinny pieces are.

But when you have a perfect setup, and when your blocks are perfectly aligned in a marvel of idealism, the skinny pieces are your only salvation.

Quickly and effortlessly, they peacefully displace the rest of the building problems built up by what represents our wasteful and ultimately fatal capitalist system.

When the game reaches its most frantic levels, the strain on these skinny pieces is much greater and they seem to become rarer.

However, with a skilled hand, you can survive longer with greater success by using the skinny pieces like this than with any other strategy.

What color are these skinny pieces, again?

Check back up top, but I think you already know the answer.

Red, of course.

That’s the color of communism, my friends. You can probably piece my point together from there.

Even for the ‘80s — and even discounting that hackneyed communist insurrection theory — Tetris was a pretty weird game.

You can’t win. Ever.

No matter how hard you try, every success is temporary.

There is no final showdown with a boss in Tetris. Even if you play against friends, the only way to beat them is to avoid losing before they do.

Tetris will wear you down, until you’re tired of working as hard as you do.

No matter how well you play, you always lose.

It has needless suffering characterized by futility and contempt for the chaos that will eventually envelop the player.

Sounds like something Chekov or Ibsen would have written, doesn’t it?

Even if Tetris isn’t a communist game, it’s at least very Russian.

[/quote]

KODY 105 · Post by **KODY 105** » Tue Apr 07, 2009 11:11 am

Is being a Russian game a cause for concern?

That did not connect the game of Tetris to communism except for the color. But every red object could be construed to communism with that thinking.

Please explain in a more viable way.

Johnny · Post by **Johnny** » Tue Apr 07, 2009 11:24 am

KODY 105 wrote:Is being a Russian game a cause for concern?

That did not connect the game of Tetris to communism except for the color. But every red object could be construed to communism with that thinking.

Please explain in a more viable way.

It depends

I'll think about it.

Fang-wa · Post by **Fang-wa** » Tue Apr 07, 2009 4:34 pm

Upon what premises do you base your case for snickerdoodles?

Does botany pose a threat to humanity by means of revolution?

Johnny · Post by **Johnny** » Tue Apr 07, 2009 4:35 pm

Fang wrote:Upon what premises do you base your case for snickerdoodles?

Does botany pose a threat to humanity by means of revolution?

Look around you kid there are so many things to base it in.

I've been to Gotham I fought Poison Ivy that's all I need to say.

KODY 105 · Post by **KODY 105** » Tue Apr 07, 2009 8:05 pm

Do you like the movie Fireproof?

Johnny · Post by **Johnny** » Tue Apr 07, 2009 8:17 pm

KODY 105 wrote:Do you like the movie Fireproof?

No

Any other questions?

GlennAdams · Post by **GlennAdams** » Tue Apr 07, 2009 8:41 pm

What's your favorite AIO episode and/or album?

Lord Sesshoumaru · Post by **Lord Sesshoumaru** » Tue Apr 07, 2009 8:49 pm

Did you get your name "Q" form the DC character called The Question (who's also a conspircy person)

Johnny · Post by **Johnny** » Tue Apr 07, 2009 9:44 pm

GlennAdams wrote:What's your favorite AIO episode and/or album?

Snow day is one of my main favorites

Did you get your name "Q" form the DC character called The Question (who's also a conspircy person)Did you get your name "Q" form the DC character called The Question (who's also a conspircy person)

Duh!

Lord Sesshoumaru · Post by **Lord Sesshoumaru** » Tue Apr 07, 2009 10:14 pm

is the Question your favorite JLU character or is their someone else who you like better?

Whats your top 10 favorite JLU characters?

KODY 105 · Post by **KODY 105** » Wed Apr 08, 2009 7:24 am

What is your opinion of the use of nuclear weapons against the Japanese in WWII?

Are you right-handed or left-handed?

Why do you not like the movie Fireproof?

Johnny · Post by **Johnny** » Wed Apr 08, 2009 8:58 am

Max Stearling wrote:is the Question your favorite JLU character or is their someone else who you like better?

Whats your top 10 favorite JLU characters?

I might put Question as one of my favorites but not exactly sure yet.

Now top ten comes in no particular order I kind of like them all equally.

Flash
Question
Batman
Huntress
Captain Atom
Green Lantern/John Stewart
Hawkgirl
Lex Luthor
Captain Boomerang
Green Arrow

My list fluctuates alot depending on my mood.

What is your opinion of the use of nuclear weapons against the Japanese in WWII?

Are you right-handed or left-handed?

Why do you not like the movie Fireproof?

The tragic but correct choice in my opinion.

Right handed

I don't like sappy christian love stories.

KODY 105 · Post by **KODY 105** » Wed Apr 08, 2009 9:41 am

Do you like Mario video games?

What is your favorite PC game?

Do you play Age of Empires 2: The Age of Kings?